fashion · stupid human tricks

Got Issues? I am your worst nightmare.

Amanda’s post at The $900 Facebook Pony got me thinking and remembering. So many of you have quirks and things that you’re OCD about around the barn.

I get that! I really do! I have a few myself: I triple check stall doors and gates, I really like a nicely swept aisle, etc. You better believe that when I muck out a stall it’s clean to the bones, and as the barn manager recently said when I told her about my endless night check, “So you OCD’d out a little bit, didn’t you?”

Here’s the thing though: there are a whole lot of things that everyone cared very much about that it never occurred to me to even think about, or at least be bothered by.

Tristan’s bridle path hasn’t been trimmed in 4+ months. I honestly can’t remember the last time I figure-8’d my bridle. (Yes, that’s a verb now.) It’s been 3+ months since I cleaned tack, which, to be fair, I haven’t really been using it. Forget trimming fetlocks. I wear breeches and barn clothes into the ground, and then I wear them a few more times, and then I wash them, except in cases of extreme filth or sweat. Usually they’re secondhand anyway, or at the very least off the clearance rack.

I have never, not once, not a single time in almost 10 years, pulled Tristan’s mane. Not a single hair.

Wild unkempt beastie.

Also, it falls naturally to the left. So I leave it there. I’ve never had more than a passing thought of training it over.

Ready for the one that would drive most of you absolutely crazy?

Take a good close look at the boots Tristan is wearing in this picture.
Those are Dover’s house brand galloping boots, in black. They’re Tristan’s standard XC boots; he’s a relatively careful horse and just needs a bit of extra padding. They wear well, and they’re cheap.
Anyone care to guess how long I used them before trimming the extra Velcro straps?
Your answer is never. I never trimmed the extra Velcro off. Every single time I put the boots on, I pulled the Velcro loops snug and left the extra bits flapping in the breeze. It never, not one single time, not once, occurred to me to cut it off.
Then Hannah came with us XC schooling and noticed that I had never cut the Velcro straps and she was horrified, and she would not let me go on course until she had trimmed them properly. See below. You can just see the LF and RH boots in this image: nicely trimmed!

The moral of the story is, I can’t be bothered and would probably drive most of you insane if you boarded with me.

In my defense, my horse is happy, healthy, never wants for anything, and I work my ass off to make sure he has what he needs. I just…don’t have that gene that needs everything around the barn to be Just Right. Neat? Clean? Relatively presentable? In immaculate shape when we’re showing? Hell yes. Any other time? Meh.

8 thoughts on “Got Issues? I am your worst nightmare.

  1. haha awesome. as i said on Amanda's post, most of my tics have to do with function and safety. the rest of it? eh, nbd. i like order and neatness – but not necessarily just for the sake of order and neatness, ya know?


  2. Today someone left the best, nicest, silkiest lunge line in a crumpled heap and put the mounting block on top of it. I very nearly sent an email to the entire barn.

    AND I AM SO NOT EVEN THAT CRAZY. But that was like spitting on the Mona Lisa. NOT appropriate.


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