If Horse Blog Posts Had Clickbait Titles
I can’t be the only person who is wildly, irrationally annoyed by clickbait titles, right? You know, the ones that one aunt/cousin/high school friend posts every 20 minutes? I see one on Facebook and I want to throw things across the room. They’re just so obnoxiously sensationalist.
So I’ve been trying to fight internet idiocy with humor, and over the last few weeks have played a little game with myself, trying to come up with horse blog posts titles a la Buzzfeed (or Upworthy or any of the other nausea-inducing fake news websites out there, hi yes, I’m a snob).
Here are a few I’ve come up with.
She Thought She Had Packed Everything for Her Show – You’ll Never Believe What She Forgot!
They Took A Long Spot – What Happened Next Will Take Your Breath Away!
6 New Half Pad Trends You Have to See to Believe!
3 Simple Steps to the Perfect Topline – Overnight!
Only ’90s Kids Will Understand: Do You Remember These Trends in Breeches?
You Won’t Believe These Galloping Boots Until You See Them in Action
This Shocking New Hunter Derby Jump Changes Everything
5 Examples of Mismatched Tack That Will Make You Lose Faith in Humanity
This Is The Most Important Photo of a Horse Standing In Its Field You’ll See All Day
That’s all I’ve got for now. Any more from you all?
Conversation last night between me and the barn manager while she was doing chores in the aisle and I was riding in the indoor.
Me: Ow! Hey, [BM], I just broke my nail on my saddle!
BM: Oh no! Wait, your fingernail or your saddle nail?
Me: My fingernail, it caught on the pommel while I was gathering rein.
BM: Oh, well then, get your damn hands out of your lap!
…she’s not wrong.
This may not be new news to anyone who reads Eventing Nation, but I finally got around to watching a few of the Evention Tv shows and I laughed until I cried. (Thanks to Saiph’s post at Wait for the Jump about finding the humor, which helped kick me out of my grumpiness about the weather and sent me to watch these.)
Here are just a few of my favorites.